January 14th Challenge: Mind Your Manners

The last few years have taken their toll on common courtesy.  A nasty sort of partisanship has entered our politics, and name-calling and the type of abhorrent views one knew existed but thought rare fill social media comments. There's an encouragement to distrust and a meanness to discourse. Meanwhile, regular old manners seem to be slipping away-- the use of please and thank you, greeting people as you pass, small talk and smiling.

If you've been doing the tiny resolutions, you've been working on being complaint-free (or at least mindfully reducing our griping).  Let's make that easier by being some of the change we want to see.  For today's challenge, try at least a few of these:

1)  Learn people's names, and use them.  Especially those of people you see often but may not know-- the security guard, the guy at the market you always visit, the admin assistant down the hall at work, the neighbor in the apartment next to you.

2)  Use your politeness words.  Please, thank you, excuse me, I'm sorry, I appreciate that.

3)  When you are talking with someone, give them some reasonable eye contact.  Put the phone away. 

4)  Make a little small talk.  With the cashier, the neighbor, the coworker.  It's not trivial.  When we comment on the weather, the big game, or any other common occurrence we are communicating that we see each other, that we are involved in a common experience.  If the other person doesn't want to engage, we should be able to tell.  (If you can't, learn about and practice reading body language).

5) Offer help when you see someone struggling, if you feel safe and are able.  If someone can't start their car, help them jump it or offer to call someone for them if they don't have a phone.  If someone has their arms full or is injured or frail or with children, hold the door.  As a matter of fact, hold the door for anyone right behind you.

6)  When you talk to someone, be mindful not to monologue and/or only talk about yourself. Ask after them.  Show interest in what they say.  Ask follow-up questions.  Practice the volley:  in these days of tweeting and posting, we forget that true conversation is two-way.

7)  Greet people when you see them.  Smile if you can.

8)  Be gracious.  Graciousness is not about being a martyr; it's about recognizing that other people have strong preferences, insecurities, and feelings just as we do and both parties count in a situation.  Sometimes others' needs outweigh yours, sometimes it's equal, and sometimes yours take precedence. Even or especially in the latter case, we can make that known graciously.  Examples for this:  offer your seat on the bus or at the standing-room-only event to someone who may need it more.  Don't take the last doughnut if you've had one and others haven't gotten to them yet.  Refill the coffeepot if you drink the last cup, replace the toilet paper, pick up after yourself in the common spaces at work, etc.

9) Show appreciation to others when they are kind/gracious/patient/trying hard.  Sometimes that just takes a smile.

10) Be the One Less Asshole in the room.  If someone is losing it, being a jerk, or has no manners, that doesn't justify your doing the same.  If you hold it together with grace and patience, that just means now there is one less possible jerk in the situation.

I bet you have some other ideas.  I'd like to hear them.  We'll do a day of Random Acts of Kindness later, so save those-- but do send ideas about waylaid manners we can try and remember. 

See you tomorrow,
Jana

January Second Challenge: Tiny Resolutions

You made it through the first day of the new decade!  Congratulations.  Hope you had time for some reflection on the past year(s) and began crafting out some personal goals for growth and happiness for 2020.
My morning involved meditation/daydreaming in my cozy bed, going over what was working, what needed adjusting, what I was grateful for and looking forward to.  I used a burning ritual to solemnize some of what I think needs to stay back in the 'oughts.  And I'm calling out for what I want to bring in to my life this year.   Anything you throw generous attention into becomes a sort of magic. You don't go out and manifest it, you are just giving awareness which ripples out, and taking opportunities to get closer to what you want.  A couple early ideas floated up-- more time with people outside of work, for eating, playing, creating, exploring and learning together.  I want to say yes more when yes is good for me, and no more when yes isn't. 

I put these into action today by staying in jammies making french toast out of the holiday panetone (resolution category:  self-care, chill time, good food), making a quick decision to join a friend passing by on a walk (I had to put on real people clothes eventually!--Res. Cat. friendship, walking in nature, being in the moment). I got off the chair and cooked a good curry for dinner rather than making do with leftover cakes and chips.  Played the new games we got as holiday presents and put up MOST of the decoration in the attic.  I liked to dribble it out so it's not such a shock to the system to go back into the real world.  I tended to my mushroom grow kits in hopes of blue oysters elms and chestnut mushroom dinners to come.
A stellar day.

They won't all be like that.  Sometimes I'm going to throw a challenge up and life will laugh and make other plans/  That's ok  These challenges can be flexible-- some days we might do three or four, some days skip.  The point is to make a point of continuing to return to them and try, with an open mind, to see what useful you can find in them. 

If you've a mind for it, grab a fresh new journal. I  discourage really fancy ones, at least if you are like me and find yourself feeling you have to be profound.  But even a bunch of stapled together scrap paper is fine.   Jot down your challenge for the day.  Daydream about ways to meet it.  Keep an eye out for oppourtunity.  At the end of the day, write what happened-- or didn't-- and why.  be honest, not mean, if you didn't do it. What got in the way?  Did you devalue the work?  Your abilities? What emotions were associated, no matter the outcome-- pride, relaxation, fear?Out of that honesty decide if you want to try again another day.  Give yourself credit if you did.

The challenge for Thursday, January 2, is to write a thank you note to 2019.  What was good about it?  What are you grateful for? Who helped you along the way?  What did you learn this year?

Again, this can be scratched on the back of a napkin or written lovingly in your new journal or marked in any way you choose.

Bonus points:  Send a thank you to someone who helped make at least part of that year easier, more amazing, less lonely, more fun.  Send it in an envelope through the postal service.  Or at the least hand write and hand deliver it.

Again, if you don't get to this today, calendar it out during the month.  Try to do as many of these exercises as you can, even if you're not sure they are your cup of tea.  At the month, you can evaluate worth.see where the teachers and teachings show up.

See you tomorrow, and welcome to day two.

Jana

Today's quote:  "Take the first step in faith.  You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step."  Dr. M.L. King

The January Challenge Begins!

January Tiny Resolutions Thirty Day Challenge is back 💖

Time to walk through that gate

Happy new decade!  That last one wasn't such an easy one for many of us.

Every day is a chance to start again-- but this New Year day we are beginning a whole new decade.
Surely there are things you're ready to leave behind and possibilities you are ready to embrace.

Works for me.

For January, I'll be posting some Tiny Resolutions every day to help us both get started.

Today, spend some time reflecting on what you'd like more, or less of, in this fresh start.  Set some intentions.  The best way to predict the future is to create it, but it starts with imagining it.  What are you ready to put away?  What are you willing to move toward?  How do you get in your own way?

Today's quote is from Dr. Seuss:
"You’ll never get bored when you try something new. There’s really no limit to what you can do."

See you tomorrow.  Enjoy this baby year and feed it well.

Jana

https://youtu.be/h0K9jxmFMNo

January 31st Challenge: Stay Awake

Did you miss me this morning?

I'm fighting off a virus and took to my bed early last night, before I post the last of the January Challenges.  

I'm ambivalent about endings. I feel good to have started and finished something, and intimidated by a narrative that the last post be Big and Meaningful and wrap everything up nicely.  

This poem has been on my desk for a while, waiting for you all.  It's Big and Meaningful, maybe a little too much.  There's a lot in here to consider:  being known and deep listening to The Other, being authentic in relationship, staying mindful, and accepting reality.  I guess that DOES wrap things up for the month nicely.

I used to want to get a tattoo that said "Stay Awake"-- just a tiny one, maybe in Czech, that would remind me to stay mindful.  But I worried that's the wrong permanent message to give a chronic insomniac, so I read this poem once in a while instead.  I hope you find as much to love in it as I do.

Thank you for playing along this January.  I'll continue to blog and post homework occasionally.  I'd love to have you along. 

A Ritual To Read To Each Other

If you don't know the kind of person I am
and I don't know the kind of person you are
a pattern that others made may prevail in the world
and following the wrong god home we may miss our star.

For there is many a small betrayal in the mind,
a shrug that lets the fragile sequence break
sending with shouts the horrible errors of childhood
storming out to play through the broken dyke.

And as elephants parade holding each elephant's tail,
but if one wanders the circus won't find the park,
I call it cruel and maybe the root of all cruelty
to know what occurs but not recognize the fact.

And so I appeal to a voice, to something shadowy,
a remote important region in all who talk:
though we could fool each other, we should consider--
lest the parade of our mutual life get lost in the dark.

For it is important that awake people be awake,
or a breaking line may discourage them back to sleep;
the signals we give--yes or no, or maybe--
should be clear: the darkness around us is deep.

William Stafford

January 27th Challenge: Seize the Sabbath

After all that adventure, time to take it down a notch or two and make sure we've rested, restored, reflected and revived our hearts and minds for the coming week.

Sunday's a good day to take note of what was good in you and for you in the past week.  Give gratitude where you can, make peace where you need to.

Today's challenge is inspired by an article in this month's Spirituality and Health Magazine, by the wise and wide-open Anne Lamott.  Her recent book covers her basic forms of prayer in its title:  "Help, Thanks, Wow".  It is short and sweet, in the best way.  She tells us, "Prayer is talking to something or anything with which we seek union, even if we are bitter or insane or broken.  (In fact, these are probably the best possible conditions under which to pray.  Prayer is taking a chance against all odds and past history:  we are loved and chosen, and do not have to get it together before we show up". 

Today's challenge is to spend some time in prayer.   Show up for your Self, for God, for Source or Earth-- whatever you may see out there that is bigger and less broken, that is unifying and with an arc that began long before your own and ends after, and look for a place of peace within the intersection of those arcs.  I can't tell you what your prayer will look, sound, feel like---  maybe it will be wordless, maybe it will be service, or maybe it will translate into art or music or just sitting still for a time, with as much love and intention as you can muster.

I hope, if you're comfortable, you'll share some of what happens here.

Jana

January 26 Challenge: Choose Your Own Adventure

Jana had little idea what to expect when she entered the Peculiarium on that strange Portland side street.  The nine foot Sasquatch that greeted her and enveloped her intrepid companion in a Yettie embrace seemed like a fortuitous start.  She hadn't know an hour earlier when she asked for a :Big Old Cup of Black Black Tea that it would arrive as requested and require two hands to quaff it.  It was a surprise when the glass gallery featured extruded predators birds of prey, Strange Young Girls with heads of lambs and rabbits, and hyperbolic planes knit out of glass; and when the ladies in the back of the labyrinth Cargo store laughed when she asked if they might have any wish lanterns, because they had just finished pricing and tagging two thousand of them. By the time her "salad" arrived smash round and vertical she was getting less surprised, so it was no surprise at all when the waiter wrote a haiku in her journal.

Make today mysterious.  Go seek tiny adventures.  Look for clues.  Ask lots of questions.  Make friendly eye contact in foreign ports (even if it's that weird gas station you never go to).  Travel far and wide to a strange land (Scio?  Brownsville?  Valley of the Giants?) and take your recording devices:  camera, watercolors, reporter's notebook, a tape recorder.  Gather evidence to add to those of fellow detectives, and we will see what alchemical product we can assemble.

This quest requires a sense of bravery, whimsey, non-judgment and perhaps a mindset borrowed from a foreign stranger.  Collect souvenirs and report back.

You know that you know what to do.

January 17th Challenge: Thankful Thursday

Got Gratitude?
Being thankful is a logical step towards an "increase in general life satisfaction and contentment" (read: happiness).  Studies find that people who kept a gratitude journal a few weeks, noting three things per day that they were thankful for, had significant improvement in happiness levels (and symptoms of illness!) over a control group.  Interestingly, the effect appeared to increase over time, even after participants stopped keeping the journal.  Other studies have shown positive benefits for relationships, decreases in depression and anxiety symptoms, and improved sleep.  Some of these involved writing just five lines a week. 

More recent research had participants relate how they were involved in the grateful event they described.     Examples: 
"My triglyceride levels are down; I have been exercising more regularly."  
"I'm thankful for the good time I had with my friend/I am thoughtful to my friend".    
"The sunset was lovely/I took time out to appreciate it." 

grateful to have adventuresome friends and that i said yes

 Adding in the factor of personal agency greatly enhanced the reported sense of well-being. 

As in several of the previous challenges, this one takes little time and can easily be incorporated into your regular daily life.  Whether you do or not, just for today:
Write down what you are grateful for, big or small, about your day, and what if anything you had to do with it.  Or choose one of the deeper challenges mentioned in this article in the New York Times about the many benefits of cultivating thankfulness.

grateful rosie let me try her camera

In other news, I am happy to report that despite some unexpected obstacles on Wednesday, I only had to turn my bracelet 6 times.  That's about as good as I get.    See yesterday's challenge if that makes no sense.  Going complaint free is a good habit to try for many days in a row.  Visit complaintfreeworld.org for inspiration.

Quote of the day: 
 I am grateful for what I am and have.
My thanksgiving is perpetual...
O how I laugh when I think of my vague indefinite riches.
No run on my bank can drain it
for my wealth is not possession but enjoyment.

                   Henry David Thoreau

January 12th Challenge: SatARTday

It's been quite the week.  You've faced your own mortality, practiced releasing expectations, and fought injustice.  I figured you could use a little juice in your tank.

Today's challenge is to immerse yourself in some art.  It can be your own or another's.  You can seek it out in unexpected places.  Go for a LONG walk and see what you can find.  You'd be surprised at the art you can find in alleys and yards.  Or go to a gallery, a museum, or a public place such as a library or hospital.  Research the tiny galleries in your town.  In Corvallis, there are rotating exhibits at the hospital, co-op, Unitarian Church and several coffee houses.  Seek out art.

Visual art, like music, provides articulation to emotions, memories and the subconscious that might otherwise remain intangible.  It is an outlet, a catalyst.  It encourages divergent thinking, critical analysis, mindful contemplation, and emotional processing. Studies show exposure to art is linked to increased happiness and reduction of stress whether you are creating or observing it.  Public art builds community identity and cohesion, a sense of place that softens the dividing structures of walls abd roads that tell the lie we are so very separate.  

Not all art is light-hearted.  This month at the Corvallis Art Center is a powerful, unavoidably political show of hundreds of white china plates, created by Professor and artist Julie Green.  Each plate is displayed next to a small pin with a number, and each of those numbers and plates represents a person who lived, breathed, had connections and hopeful people who loved hem.  Each is an inmate executed in the United States, and their last meal request is painted in simple strokes on these china plats The concept is so simple; the impact so profound.  "Washington, 5 January 1993:   Salmon, Potatoes, Vegetable, Green Salad Dessert"  There is something very humanizing about these choices.  Some wanted family to cook for them (most jails denied that).  Texas outlawed special requests over 20, then got rid of them altogether.  Seeing these plates, these meals--some sad, some grandiose, some defiant.--I think I ran the emotional gamet.  The prisoners seemed to choose iconic meals.  Some want home cooking; some don't want to think they'll forgotten anything  and order as much of everything that they can, grasping at that last investment in the corporeal while a heart, their human heart, still beats, exercising the bequeath of a final comfort just a bit of control.If you can take it, stop by,  Wander from plate to plate and see if you can combine some of the challenges for the week into one amalgam of compassion, stillness, release of expectations.  If the end, if you feel called to duty, perhaps you can write to a governor in a state where last meal requests are denied to ask this human to human gesture be reinstated.


There are monsters represented in Julie's plates.  Humans that through genetics, circumstance, drugs or desperation unmitigated by outside support and intervention ended up in very dark places, doing terrible things.  Some may be lacking the "empathy gene"-- their brains may truly be incapable of imagining other people as three dimensional human beings.  But they had  lives that I imagine extended many directions beyond that moment when everything went wrong.
Some of the inmates (estimates vary from 10-20) were mentally ill ; nearly all had brain damage from trauma of illness.  Since 1963, more than 80 persons with mental retardation or severe mental issue were executed.  I won't debate here whether they deserved it as a result of their inhumane actions.  But they deserved some comfort, some last lingering demonstration that there is a difference approach to the Other.  One that is predicated in compassion and recognition of a soul worthy of redemption.   The Green Mile and Dead Man Walking are two powerful films that demonstrate this viscerally. 

Making art with Val last weekend

Go see it if you can.  The Last Supper, Arts Center Corvallis, 7th and Madison, through Mid February,
If that's too heavy, reel it in.  Find an easier tableau.  Or make a small piece of art and hide it as a gift in a public place-- a valentines card, a small origami swan, , a decorated envelope.  Write a confession on am illustrated postcard and send it in to the Interzone Post-Secret show.  Invite a friend over to craft.Decorate your wall outlets with collage, embossable metal, beautiful papers.    Paint wildly on wet paper.  If you need ideas, there's many to be found on the internet, at the library, or ask a kid.  Go to a natural area and arrange found objects into a pleasing temporary sculpture (get inspired:  watch a video or read a book about Andy Goldsworthy first).  You'll figure something out.  If you're inclined, find a friend or two with whom you can adventure together.

Send me photo evidence of what you make or find.  If you're willing, I will post some in these pages
Quote of the day:   
"What art offers is space - a certain breathing room for the spirit.  ~John Updike"
Song of the day:

January 11 Challenge: Work to Change Bad Realities

How's this for crazy making?
Yesterday's challenge included this line: 
"What would happen if we expected reality to be just as it is?"
And taken out of context, it would appear today's challenge is asking you to do the exact opposite.

Today, think about some social, political, environmental issue that raises your blood pressure.  And do something about it.

When faced with a problem, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy founder Marsha Linehan says we have four choices.  We can solve it, change our perception of it, practice radical acceptance (which is NOT approval, but releasing resistance to what cannot be changed-- touched upon in yesterday's challenge), or stay miserable.

Today I want you to think about a reality you find difficult to accept-- something outside of yourself.  Racism, poverty, current gun sales laws.  It doesn't have to be nearly that big.  Maybe you worry about classroom sizes, or lack of funding for the arts in schools.

Pick an issue, something you feel passionate about.  And then do something about it.  Write your local paper or local representatives.  Volunteer to do the thing you think needs to get done.  Change your behavior in some concrete way so you are contributing less to the problem or more to the solution.

Think about it.  It was the people's refusal to accept socially constructed realities around women's rights, interracial marriage, slavery, segregation that finally changed laws that supported this injustices.  When enough people make enough noise (or even more importantly, change their own behaviors), reality shifts.  In the last several years, we've been faced with such overwhelming complexity in issues like education, environmental change, and information privacy, to name a few, that many of us have thrown up our hands.  "What difference can one person make?"

Not much.  But many drops make a stream, and many streams a river.  And a river can change an entire landscape.

How will you begin?  What can you do today?

Let me know,
Jana
Today's quote:  “The world is not dangerous because of those who do harm but because of those who look at it without doing anything” ~ Albert Einstein

January 10th Challenge: Check Your Expectations

"Expectations are premeditated resentments."

this sky should be blue

A friend (shout-out, Rosie S!) recently shared this quote from AA philosophy.   Reading online about the various interpretations, I found this:  "I understand how this short axiom can be confusing without the contextual background provided by AA (or Buddhism for that matter). The overriding premise is other people, places, and things are not my problem. How I respond to other people, places, and things is my problem."

When we bring an expectation into a situation, we have a predetermined outcome pictured. And with that, we've already limited our response and our experience.   "He doesn't love me" may be a true and difficult fact.  "He should love me" is a judgment, and an expectation that reality (something outside our control) is wrong.  This sets even more trouble into play.

How we respond= our response-ability.  Today's challenge is to notice your expectations.  See how they are linked to judgment and story-telling, and how the impact the outcome.  Do you cherry-pick data to support the expectation?  Do you ignore the data and expect, for example, the roommate who has historically been messy will be neat today, and thus become disappointed anew?

What would happen if we expected reality to be just as it is?  If we accepted that the answer to most of our questions about the future is simply this:
 "I don't know."

This doesn't mean we don't plan, don't act strategically based on history.  But we can gently, lovingly release a bit of our grasping on how we think things ought to be.  Then we may have just a little more energy for dealing with how they are.

Today's song is rated Geez Whiz You'll Hear Worse at Any School Yard for language and adult themes, but is an excellent example of expectations as resentments.

January 9th Challenge: Take a Walk

Now that I busted your chops with Tuesday's heavy consider-mortality challenge, I thought we'd better do some self-soothing.

Today's challenge is easy*:  take a walk.
It would be great if you can take a real long ramble.  But it's hump day, so do what you can.  Park a little further away than usual.  Or walk to work, or lunch, or down the hall to speak to a coworker rather than instant-messaging or emailing them.

The benefits of walking are multitude:  environmental, psychological, physical.  Walking soothes the soul; note how animals in a zoo and humans in a stressful situation pace. The alternating movements of the limbs encourages cross-communication in the brain and is, in a way, like being rocked.

We can see more when we walk, especially if we put away the mobile devices.  We have a chance to interact with people, nature, and the human environment.

Let me know what happens for you.
Jana
 *p.s.  There are some people I know who can't walk.  Rolling works.  Or dance in your bed.  If nothing else, dream a walk with your beautiful brain.

From a 2010 blog

Above all, do not lose your desire to walk.  Every day I walk myself into a state of well-being and walk away from every illness.  I have walked myself into my best thoughts, and I know of no thought so burdensome that one cannot walk away from it.  --Soren Kierkegaard

Ten good reasons to walk, by Wendy Bumgardner.  Live longer, lose weight, prevent diabetes, and more.  "

When you have worn out your shoes, the strength of the shoe leather has passed into the fiber of your body.  I measure your health by the number of shoes and hats and clothes you have worn out".  --Ralph Waldo Emerson

And there's also

1.  Time to think.  "Thoughts come clearly while one walks".  --Thomas Mann

2.  Savings in time and money:  See the math here.  

3.  Carbon load reduction: Each gallon of gas used equals 19.5 lbs of carbon dioxide emissions according to US Department of Energy.

4.  A chance to observe things you would otherwise never see.  "In every walk with nature one receives far more than he seeks."  --John Muir

5.  Community building:  chat up your neighbors, get to know your town.

 See you 'round the block--

Mitsvah Monday, and some revisionist /Reconstructionist history

all play and no blog this weekend

Hi.  Miss me?  I missed you.  I was busy in the woods and mountains doing secret challenges involving taking risks, creating, observing a day of rest, and connecting with nature.  I'll give you an extra challenge for Groundhog Day to make up.

Those of you on the Facebook Group (join here now) did get late instructions to connect with nature.  What a fine job you did.  We had Mount Tabor climbers, photo-documenting the experience.  We had bird watchers and swan lovers and compost composers.

Remember, you can do these tasks at any time during the month, and you are eligible for a prize if you finish all by Feb 2, Groundhog's day.  The winner receives a random desk drawer dumped into a box, or other assorted treasures, and smug satisfaction, increase in general positive warm feelings towards self and others, shiner hair, etc.

Sunday--seeing that it's over now, you can count as your day of rest.  Anyone want to share some good self-care tales from their day?  Here's mine:  jammies and art and packing up to retreat from out retreat.  Long meandering (alternating with terrifying hurtling times) ride down the snow mountain.  Singing.  My yearly peppermint milkshake.  Some kitchen dancing.  Connection with competent women.

Don't just stand there-- be a dear/deer

Which brings us to today's Monday Mitsvah Challenge:  Do a kindness for another.  As always, the opportunities are endless and varied.  You can loan someone your phone, pay them a compliment, but them a cup of fair-trade tea.  You can offer to do something important and helpful even if it's not in your job descriptions.  You can take something sweet to a shut-in, perhaps soup or maybe just your company.  Smile and greet strangers, volunteer at the soup kitchen, let someone in a bigger hurry go ahead in line. Teach someone a skill they need, or assist them. do.  Pay a compliment.  Buy someone a cup of tea.  You get the picture.

Brooke from Ohio offers today's quote:
"Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible". Tenzin Gyatso, 14th Dalai Lama
 Today's song from the wonderful project PLAYING FOR CHANGE:

January 4th Challenge: Gather Evidence to the Contrary

one narrative...

How's your autobiography going?  I'm not talking about a written one, but about the stories we tell ourselves daily about who we are and what we are capable of doing.  Many of us hold self-limiting beliefs that weigh us down.  Today's challenge is to identify one of these and then diligently search for evidence to the contrary.

Examples worth challenging:
I haven't accomplished much in my life.
There's no one I can turn to for help.
I'm not brave.
I can't change.


And nearly anything that starts with:  "I'm always/ I'm never"
 
Check your narrative.  Think of a negative you hold true for yourself.  Spend a few minutes pondering the effects of holding on to the negative belief.  Then sift through your personal history searching for any evidence that refutes it.  Be creative.  Remember, for example, that being brave doesn't mean doing something fearlessly, but doing it even if you are scared.  Think of times you did.  Write down your evidence!

Extra karmic credit:  Put it in action.  Add to your evidence today.

See you Saturday,
Jana


Quote of the day:
"Be not afraid of growing slowly, be only afraid of standing still."  ~Chinese proverb
Song of the day:

January 3 Challenge: Get Er Done

born to be distracted

What's that hanging over your head?

Today's challenge is to take care of one thing on the To-Do list.  What's something you've been putting off?
Scheduling that mammogram/colonoscopy/dental check up?  Opening up that bill or email?  Returning that sweater that doesn't fit, that phone call that feels like trouble?

Pick one thing, small or large.  Write it down.  Do it.  Cross it off.  Be done!

There's a general law regarding animal behavior: avoid discomfort.  Did you ever do that experiment in biology class where you aim a little laser light or prod a sharp pin at an amoeba?  Even these little single celled creatures, lacking a central nervous system, will move out of the way.  We move out of the way too, and embellish with lots of rationalizations and distractions.  We're more sophisticated in behavioral repertoire. And the funny thing is, Brain happily accepts temporary comfort of avoidance as a Big Reward: DING!  Problem averted!  But this momentary relief is often accompanied by prolonged vague dread.  And psychological dis-ease.  Enough of that and we can even get physical disease.  Remember, Mind and Body occupy the same vehicle.  We really aren't as smart as more instinctual life-forms.  We cause ourselves all sorts of trouble with our temporary avoidance.

don't wither on the branch

We also procrastinate because, as humans, we are fantastic story-tellers.  When we aren't sure what will happen next, we make up tales.  Usually scary ones.  Like:  the dentist will yell at me for missing my last cleaning, then say all the teeth must go.

Most of the time, our dread of the task consumes much more energy than the actual doing of it.  The stories are overblown.  And even when they aren't-- when we are facing something that truly is going to be difficult, no ifs, ands or buts-- well, it doesn't go away just because we don't do it.  If there IS a tumor, the bill IS really high, the person IS frustrated we haven't called back-- it's not getting less complicated with delay.

Dealing with the hard stuff = hell to pay.  Putting it off:  Hell to pay, plus interest.

I can write for days about procrastination.  I'm a pro at it.  Maybe I will pick five things for Thursday's challenge.  I'll let you know what I did.   How about you?   What does future self want you to take care of now?

Related reading:  The Now Habit:  A Strategic Program for Overcoming Procrastination and Enjoying Guilt Free Play.  Neil Fiore, PhD.
Quotes of the day:  “God has promised forgiveness to your repentance, but He has not promised tomorrow to your procrastination.”  St. Augustine
"Procrastination is the thief of time.  Collar him."  Charles Dickens

Vid of the day: 

January 2 Challenge: Lighten Your Load

stuff

Stuff.  Most of us have lots of stuff.  I have more than most. I was one of those kids who always had treasures in her pockets, in little boxes.  I saved rocks from trips, letters from pen pals, my brownie pin, the tangerine my sweetheart gave me on our first date that dessicated on the windowsill before I could eat it. 

Some of my stuff lifts me up.  Some of it just weighs me down.   Whether our extra baggage is physical, metaphorical or psychological, we could all stand to lose a little. Today's challenge is to lighten your load in a symbolic or actual way.  By doing so, we have the opportunity to give a nod to impermanence, investigate our attachments and the trouble they cause us, and maybe even clear out a little breathing room.

For many of us January 2 is the first day back at work after a long break.  You can make this challenge as big or small as you like; it can be a five minute task or an all day affair.  Here are some ideas:

Pack a box for Goodwill or another charity shop.  Give a nice outfit you no longer need to an organization like Dress for Success, which provides wardrobes for job seekers.  Regift something to someone who will appreciate or use it.  Pass some canned goods and packaged foods on to a food bank.  Take some of those leftover treats to work to share. 

Give something up for the day (or longer).  If you've overindulged during the holidays, take a day off from sugar, simple carbs, junk.

more stuff 

On the more psychological side:
Examine your limiting beliefs and behaviors and choose one to give up just for today.  Perhaps self-deprecation, negativity, or self-righteousness.
Surrender a resentment toward yourself, a situation or a person.  Write it down, "out of the body and onto the page", and how you will live it today.  Maybe add what you see as a positive outcome of choosing to release it.

I'm betting you all will come up with other inventive ways to play with the idea of shedding some excess. 
Let me know how you managed to lighten up a little today.  You can leave comments here, email me or join us on Facebook.

Thanks for being company on the 31 day challenge!
Jana

Quote of the day:

Contrary to what some people might believe, there is nothing wrong with having pleasures and enjoyments. What is wrong is the confused way we grasp onto these pleasures, turning them from a source of happiness into a source of pain and dissatisfaction. ~Lama Yeshe

Song of the day:  This one stymied me.  I'm up for better answers, but it has the theme of nonattachment.

GOT RESOLVE? Happy New Year!

Welcome to a brand-spanking New Year!

prizes!

Here's your annual chance to put a new spin on your story.  Door Number Two holds 31 ways to get-er-done, and a strange and wonderful surprise package for the first to complete them all.

Every day this month we'll have a new challenge hand-picked to assist you on your path to a Shinier, Sparklier, Healthier, Happier and Even More Attractive YOU.

Now here's the deal with resolutions:  more than half of us make them every January 1st.  Most of us make the same ones every year:  lose weight, quit (x), start (y).When we are specific, nearly half of us are still at it 6 months later, compared to the lousy 4% crowd who merely thought generally about self-improvement.  Door Number Two has lofty goals for you, but with tiny achievable daily objectives and lots of choices.  Y
Subscribe to the feed or join the Facebook group to keep up.  If you're willing, post your progress in the comments. 

Ready?
Roll up your sleeves and let's dive in with RESOLUTION ONE:

CLEAN UP YOUR ACT.

Tons of spiritual traditions involve a ritual wash to start new efforts.  This ranges from an early morning handwashing to begin the day to an immersion in a body of water to cleanse the soul.   Live the metaphor of a fresh start by preparing a ceremonial cleanse for the first day of your new year.

Before you get wet, spend a few minutes contemplating what you are releasing from the last year. (Extra credit:  rite it down!)   Take some nice, calm breaths and prepare yourself for a fresh start.  Imagine the water as your alchemical assistant in the process.  
 
Here's some choices:
Take a sauna.
Prepare a wonderful bath.  Consider candles, a balancing salt additive-- whatever floats your boat.

Find a body of water and take a splash bath.  Or do it up big and take a polar swim! (Note from my inner yenta:  if you live somewhere like my latitude, don't do this alone, or without a wetsuit.  Takes about 45 seconds to lose muscle control in this water).
Soak and cleanse your feet, then love them up with some lotion and cozy socks.
Wash your face, with intention and kindness, as a mother might wash that of a child she loves.
Wash your hands, slowly and carefully, and think of the hands in your life that have brought you to this new year.

Related link:  Lisa Wells, Yogi of Live Well Studios, has a nice blog on yogic skin care here.
 Quote of the day:
"Sorrow can be alleviated with good sleep, a bath, and a glass of wine."  ~St. Thomas Aquinas

Happy new beginnings!
Song of the day:  

Stirring Towards The Sun

"Au milieu de l'hiver, j'apprenais enfin qu'il y avait en moi un été invincible."-- Albert Camus

Solstice greetings, surviviors!   We made it past the latest apocalypse and apparently, we are still here.  And in the words of Dr. Who, we are now "halfway out of the dark".  All over the world, winter solstice is marked by celebrations and rituals marking the return of the light and new beginnings.  After weeks of increasing nights, we are stirring towards the sun.

Seems a perfect time for reflection and shedding of the dark we want to leave behind.  Light a candle, write down your regrets, and make a plan to let them go.

In ten days I'll start the January Challenges.  This year let's go for broke:  31 days to a shinier, happier, *new and improved you!  The blog will feature a tip and a challenge a day for increasing happiness, health, community, and creativity.  Your participation and comments are invited and welcome.

Song of the day:


Wishing you warm blessings for the holidays,
Jana
(*Not that you aren't perfect just as you are...)

January Cleaning Up-- revelations of Icelandic poem and first letters

A little deconstruction for those of you who played the poet games.
The Icelandic poem was by the prolific and brilliant author and songwriter Sjón.  It's a beauty.

(night of the lemon)
(night)

glittering
mist from the sea
the streetlights grew bigger
a lantern shone in every drop
on my spectacles
we sat out on the balconies
and sliced lemons
threw the slices away
so they covered the street
glittering
eye to eye
in the night

(of the lemon)

The first letter poems are (P) Prayer, by Galway Kinnell
and (WIMJ) What's In my Journal by William Stafford.  Both are worth looking up.

And now we go back to our regular programming.  But first, listen to Kinnell's counsel to a student, despondent over a broken heart.  There's something there for all sorts of broken hearts.

January 31st Challenge: Le Grand Finale'-- 10en20!

 Oh, it's been a good ride, chitlins.
    We made it 30 out of 31 days, enough to please the Wabi-Sabi gods, who are offended when we pretend to approach perfection.
     I'm looking forward to sending your prizes, so please email your address (infoATjanasvobodaDOTcom) if you haven't already.
    For the final day of our creativity challenge, write 10 poems in twenty minutes.  Don't obsess except about beating the clock.  If you don't want to post all of them. leave what you will in the comment section.  If you're just feeling shy, e them all to me if you like and I'll keep them virtual and unseen.

 ----------------drum roll----------------------THE TITLES-------------------drum roll--------------------

1)  Bad Food
2)  Before I Was Married
3)  My Secret Superpower
4)  Shower Song
5)  Splendor in the Mass
6)  Remote Vibe
7)  Bug in a Jar
8)  Test Your Mettle
9)  Us and the Raft
10)  Icelandic Poetry

I'll miss your creativity.  If any of you want to continue on a yahoo group, e me and we'll get it going on.  Play is an underrated virtue.

Jana

January 30th Challenge

Titles for the 10en20 are going a little slow.  Hope you found some Sunday creativity.

I'll hold out for 10en20 for our finale' day on Tuesday. 

Today I bent the truth to be kind, and I have no regret, for I am far surer of what is kind than I am of what is true.  --Robert Brault

Here's an easy Monday challenge:  Practice some uncommon courtesy.

Looking forward to hearing what you did.

Lots of resources linked below should you need a little guidance.

Jimmy Daggett's daily kindness challenge blog (not updated in a while, but scroll on down when you get there for good ideas).

February 13-19th is National Acts of Kindness week.  Gear up here.  

From last year's challenge list:  Be generous (it needn't be with money).

100 Kindness ideas from another Kind Blog.

Another list from LifeHack.

100 Ways to Serve Others from the Learn This site.

Today's video: